Throughout my career, I have helped a variety of people come to terms with grief and loss in my bereavement counselling sessions in Stretton, and because of this, I understand the necessary steps that need to be taken for the period to pass as painlessly as possible. Losing someone is one of the hardest things for a person to go through, especially when they were close to the deceased. If you find yourself bereaved and feel unsure about how to effectively deal with your loss, then take note of the following ways to help yourself through this period of your life.
Don’t Isolate Yourself
As a bereavement counsellor, I understand how you may want to lock yourself away from the world, but it is very important that you remain social during the grieving period. Isolation will only increase your unhappiness as you have no one to express your feelings to or to talk with about how the loss is affecting you. Sharing positive memories with others who are also experiencing this loss can help you to come to terms with the death of this person, by reflecting on the life they led before they passed away. Furthermore, surrounding yourself with people can also present you with a distraction from your loss and ease the feelings of sadness and depression that can impact on your mental wellbeing if you isolate yourselves from others.
Allow Yourself Time to Grieve
Don’t throw yourself back into a busy working or family lifestyle after suffering a loss, as you need to give yourself time to grieve without having any additional stresses. Take time off from work and have family and friends help at home so that you can have the time to come to terms with the loss you have faced. If you rush back into a busy family or work life you can prevent yourself from properly grieving over your loss, which can then lead to mental health issues as you haven’t given yourself the time to process the death and accept the situation. If possible, don’t return to work until you have truly faced the grieving process and feel in a positive mindset.
Keep Up a Small Routine
Whilst being too busy and trying to ignore your grief can affect you negatively, keeping up a small structured routine can actually help to ease you through the bereavement period and bring a small sense of normality to this time. Sometimes you need to allow your mind to drift from the grief and focus on something positive. Otherwise, you could find yourself spiralling into negative thoughts and feeling regretful. Some structured daily pattern, as simple as waking up at a set time, making breakfast and reading the paper, can help to remind you that your life will go on despite the terrible loss you have felt. Some other ideas include walking your dog, cleaning a different room each day of the week or meeting up with friends and family. How you do it is up to you. It won’t be the same but that doesn’t mean it won’t be good.
Avoid Trying to ‘Numb’ the Pain
Don’t use alcohol or drugs as a way to dull the pain you feel as this can have a detrimental effect on both your mental and physical health. Using alcohol or drugs can prevent you from properly addressing your grief, leading to long-term issues. Looking for a short-term solution like taking drugs can have a terrible effect on your health, leading to shortened life and long-lasting health issues. Face your grief as advised in this article and repress any desires to use alcohol or drugs as a solution. All it does is create more issues for the future.
Get Counselling to Help
If you are struggling to cope or start to feel anxious or depressed, then it may be time to visit a counsellor for help. Counselling, like the sessions held at my own practice in Stretton, can help you face the intensified emotions that you are feeling and repair any damage to relationships it has caused. Counselling should come into play when you cannot see an end to your grief and the pain it is causing you, so you can get help moving through the bereavement process more effectively. Not only will counselling help you to open up about your feelings but it can also help you to identify coping mechanisms and to start repairing any damage that may have been caused to those around you.
If you need further help with grief and want an empathetic response to your loss, then contact me today for professional bereavement counselling. I’m based near Warrington and everything is kept completely confidential.